Marriage, Sprints and Marathon – Running the right race

Before European football took over the passions of many in this part of the world, Athletics was one of the major events sports fans will look forward to seeing anytime. One event that would always draw the crowd happens to be the 100 meters dash. This race is always tension soaked, adrenalin-pumping, emotional, fast and furious, most importantly, the winner is determined in seconds.

Relationships can be like that you know – boy meets girl, thunder strikes as both hearts find rhythm, with a zest of energy, the relationship splashes off the block, with a string of fast paced steps towards the mark, and within a short while, the finishing line is in sight. In the sprints, so much activity and so much energy gets dissipated within seconds, leaving even the champion drained, tired and took weak at times to even do the victory run. No wonder, the 100m dash is always the last event of every major fiesta.

So many literally sprint through relationships, they relish the 10 seconds and want everything to happen within that time. This is not about how many months or years you dated; it’s more of the mind-set going into relationship. In sprinting, everything has to happen fast and within your best time. This is too fast an attitude for marriage. Marriage has more to do with a different kind of race – the marathon.

Marathon is the long haul; it is the king of races. It is the test of preparation, patience, stamina and endurance. While 100m dash is a straight line movement without contours or detours on a well prepared track, marathon will take you through the entire city landscape, through neighbourhoods of different types and most times, the street will be filled with people who are there to cheer and jeer. For instance, it appears people generally have enough time and money to do everything fun and good during dating.

Marriage is not a sprint. The conditions at the beginning may not always remain at peak pace and the race is not always over in 10 seconds. For long distance minded couples, the first sign of lost of sparks or decline in speed will not mean the race is over. Marathon runners train in high altitude, so that their attitude can be adjusted to the varying requirements of the race.

The dating and break up cycle in pre-marital relationships has affected marriages so adversely. People rush into relationships and rush out several times in a single year. People become used to breaking up – and they forget to adjust when they eventually get married. I believe couples easily forget that walking out on marriage is far different from breaking up with a dating partner, of course, bad habits die hard.

Maybe you are planning to get married, have you prepared for the marathon? Does it mean people should die in bad marriages? Marathons do have casualties – but preparation and adjustments can limit the damage, and of course there are always ambulance services to help.  Marriage is long distance; you must be prepared to finish the race – accept nothing less.